I still can't work out why Panda's are voluntarily becoming extinct. Is it a captivity thing or what? It looks likely that the purpose of life is not so much 'reproduction' (which maintains a one-for-one transfer) but more likely proliferation (which entails a one-for-many gig). Most big, chunky, life-forms enjoy a proliferation rate ofabout 2-1, the level increasing as the creature gets smaller - Rabbits might proliferate 20-1 or Spiders 1000-1.
Since the extinction of the dinosaurs, Nature has been busy downsizing. Everything got smaller, including the trees. This is most likely due to the reduction in carbon emissions (methane etc) making the world colder, ice-ages etc. The funny thing about Global Warming or it's smaller, more confused, 'Climate Change' is that the more sunlight hits the planet, the more water is freed-up into the atmosphere and the more oxygen is created. In other words, Climate Change is a Good Thing. It means we'll get huge vegetation growing agian, rainforests etcd.
What does that have to do with Pandas not fucking? I'm not sure... change direction...
Are Pandas sexy? Well, the one thing they are not is vigorous. They are docile, lumbering things that eat a specialized vegetarian diet - most likely the cause of their slothful ways. In essence, they are doomed to be continually exhausted. Perhaps the very idea of fucking, of using up massive quantities of energy and eventually sharing half your meal with a Panda Foetus is extremelly daunting? Exhaustion is not sexy, it's draining - this might be the reason married couples get so distant. A life consumed by 9-5 (or 9-9 if you concede unpaid overtime as part-and-parcel of job-responsibility) is utterly exhausting and by the time people get home and do all the daily chores and domestic shit necessary in order to keep the house-boat afloat, the concept of the rewards of sex are usurped by the concept of the rewards of just chilling and snoozing. This is the Panda's dilemna.
It might also be the reason why the indigenous folks of Western 'Developed' societies are actually dropping in terms of numbers. There is something hideously wrong with this picture. By chasing the 9-5 reality of society and living-up to 24-hour society's demands, humans are actually turning their backs on the whole 'roliferation' scenario.
So if diet means the Panda is too fucked to fuck, then how did it survive before? I don't know, I'm not a Panda-ologist. Do Pandas hybernate? This is a good damn question because most bears do... Hybernation basically prolongs the existence of a large animal by cutting out the whole 'hunt-for-food' gig in the wintertime, turning the animal into a summertime battery-charger to avoid a winter of pointless depression and starvation. Pandas are fat, so if they are'nt hybernating then they fucking well should be.
Captivity is probably something to do with it too. You get your diet handed to you day-by-day by people who don't really know enough about you to work out whether there's something missing, then chances are you don't know either. Raised eating solely bamboo, these poor bastards are likely to missing some intrinsic element in their diet that biologists and vetenerians have missed during their observations before placing them in captivity. It's possible that wild pandas eat something else, even if it is as simple as a mineral condiment from scratching walls and licking their claws....
I think what I'm trying to say is I don't know anything about Pandas and am not going to do the research but I'd like to draw attention to the dilemna as something to do at 22:53 on a Thursday night because I got fuck-all better to do. I've offered some opinions and made some observations...
And that's why.